Dating In France: 16 Things You Should Know Before Dating French

France has a curious dating culture that’s different from what you’re used to in the west. There is no such thing as an “exclusivity talk” here, so how do you know that you’re already dating someone?

What do you wear when everything in town is so chic and lovely? How can you keep up in a culture renowned for its masterful seducers?

You’ve arrived in France, the land of wine, cheese, and sexy accents, and you’re ready to mingle. But how do you go about finding a romantic partner here?

We have rounded up a guide on what you should anticipate from the French dating scene, from rather strange facts to proper protocol. Keep reading to learn more about dating in France.

Dating In France: 16 Things You Should Know Before Dating French

1. First of all, there is no such thing as dating in France.

That is, there is no word for “dating” in France. What they have instead of “date” is “rendez-vous,” which can mean either a romantic encounter (though this term is rarely used) or a casual get-together between friends.

A “rendez-vous” can be a romantic date, but it can also be a very formal appointment or a non-romantic gathering with friends or relatives.

The closest French for “to date” is “voir/frequenter quelqu’un (e),” which simply means “seeing someone.” Modern French speakers have adopted the English word “date,” but that doesn’t mean the same concept of “dating” in the United States is automatically understood in France.

2. Language and cultural barriers should be anticipated.

Prepare yourself for cultural differences if you’re interested in dating a French man/woman. These may make it more challenging to communicate and connect, but they also may offer some spice to the relationship.

You should also anticipate a potential language barrier. Any level of French proficiency will benefit from having a French conversation companion. If you don’t do this, you’ll miss out on learning some cool new lingo. Learning French via dating a French person is a terrific idea.

The act of learning a language for another person is deeply romantic. To practice more, you can work on your fluency by practicing with friends.

3. When it comes to romance, the French tend to be more conservative.

Although one-night stands are popular in many parts of the world, the French place a considerably higher value on committed partnerships. It’s even possible to label their views on it as conservative. There is a strong emphasis on loyalty in French culture, which tends to result in relationships that endure longer than average.

If a French person is dating someone, it’s almost certain that marriage is on their mind. Similarly conventional are the established gender roles in a couple’s dynamic. In other parts of the world, it is socially acceptable for both sexes to flirt and show interest. But in France, the guy is expected to initiate contact first.

4. Whenever two people “date” in France, it’s always exclusive.

“Let’s be exclusive” is not a phrase you’ll hear in French conversation.

There is an expectation of exclusivity when a kiss has been shared. No one ever pursues many prospects simultaneously. Things may progress more slowly in France because the French enjoy the pursuit so much and take their time when doing it.

5. In France, you don’t just go up to a total stranger and ask them out on a date.

Before going on a date, French people typically spend a lot of time getting to know each other. You won’t hear about men or women picking someone up at a pub and going on a date with them.

In France, people want to get to know each other socially before being romantically involved with one another. Because of this, the idea of a blind date does not exist in France.

French people usually only date people they already know or have met through established networks. They also use dating apps but only go out to meet after they have been talking to someone there for a while.

6. When dating in France, it is common to go out with a group of people first.

A couple will rarely go out alone when they are first getting to know each other. They avoid going out on solo dates in favor of going on group dates with their pals. The mood will be more chill this way. It’s a wonderful opportunity to meet each other’s friends, too.

7. It’s normal for a first date to be low-key.

Even at the beginning of a relationship, the French value informality. There is no “dating code” or traditional sequence of dates like there is in other cultures.

The purpose of a first date, rather, is to get to know one another and build a rapport before getting physically involved. On the first date with a French man or woman, you should not count on receiving any signs of romantic interest or commitment like flowers or expensive gifts.

8. The first date in France

Location

Traditionally, the first date in France entails either coffee or drinks (at a brasserie or café) or, less frequently, dinner at a nice restaurant. It’s also fun to do something together on a first date, but it won’t feel like a “date” and therefore won’t put as much pressure on the two of you.

The French usually go to a museum, comedy club, or concert. Then, if things go well, you can casually suggest going on a second, more formal date.

Outfit

First dates are routine for French women. For them, it’s just another opportunity to meet someone they might find intriguing and beautiful. It’s just one of a hundred other plans she has to make on a certain day.

Rather, people just put more emphasis on wearing items that make them comfortable and happy. French women are shy about showing their interest on a first date, therefore they avoid dressing provocatively.

That First Kiss

The French have no official protocol for the first kiss. The two of you may experience love at first sight (“un coup de foudre”) and kiss on the first date, or it may develop over time.

9. The exclusivity talk is not a thing when it comes to dating in France

A conversation between two people is typically required in other cultures before they may declare themselves an official, exclusive couple.

The rules of courtship in France are distinctive. When you’re seeing someone, you’re not allowed to socialize with anyone else. As soon as you kiss someone you’ve been seeing, you’re a pair. There’s also no need to elaborate on your chosen status label.

10. The French are known for their penchant for flirting.

Even while the French prefers to keep things casual and unromantic, there is still plenty of room for flirtation.

One could even say that in France, flirting is a type of art, and that’s true for both sexes. For example, French women are respected for their beauty and wit, and society expects them to embrace their feminine side.

They may blush, smile widely, and laugh heartily at your jokes while fidgeting nervously with their hair. Meanwhile, French men see courting as a game, despite their knowledge that it won’t lead anywhere serious. Curiously, many people value the game more than the catch itself.

One should keep in mind that a person’s flirtatious behavior does not guarantee that they are interested in or available to you. Asking them straight up is preferable to avoiding misunderstandings.

11. The French like to play it cool.

When it comes to courtship, the French are notoriously reserved and don’t like to come out as too eager. The result is sometimes a “fashionably late” arrival at a date.

The French even have a phrase (le quart d’heure de politesse) for arriving late. This equates to being late for a whole twenty-five minutes.

Don’t take their silence as a lack of interest though; because it often means the opposite. Stay put until you see them arrive, and you’ll know for sure.

12. Don’t be shocked by a French man or woman’s haste to proclaim his or her romantic feelings for another.

In France, it’s usual for a couple to start referring to each other as “girlfriend” and “boyfriend” after only a couple of occasions. Contrary to what it may mean in other cultures, being “locked in” is not the case here.

It’s also possible for them to declare their love for you, implying that they merely enjoy your company rather than actively seeking a lifelong commitment.

This is because, by the time they start dating, they are already familiar with one another. You should get used to those precious three words a lot more while you’re in a romantic country like France.

13. The French people are often still in contact with their exes.

In general, French millennials (and often those of a somewhat older generation) have no trouble staying in touch with their exes. Ex-partners can easily be found on social networking sites like Facebook.

The French are known for their forthrightness when discussing prior relationships (after all, they are called “past” for a reason). You might run into them in public, have phone conversations with them, or even strike up friendships with them.

14. In French dating, PDA is not frowned upon.

In France, PDAs are not frowned upon but rather encouraged. It’s common for couples to embrace one another frequently.

Perhaps this accounts for the prevalent belief that the French are romantically liberated. Your PDA is obviously for your lover only. Loyalty is still vital to the success of the partnership.

15. The Frenchwoman is in charge.

When it comes to romantic relationships, women in France hold all the cards. If she has to have more than one dinner with him to make up her mind, she will. After that, she’ll either clarify the matter or continue flirting purely for the fun of it.

In addition, a woman says No or Go whatever she pleases after any number of “rendez-vous galants,” and no one will hold her to any standards or hold her accountable in any way.

16. The French dating scene is more enjoyable if you know the language.

To have a successful romantic relationship with a French man or woman, it is important to know the language. You can get off to a better start on your romantic adventure together if you can avoid misunderstandings.

Plus, learning French is a surefire way to win over your French prospect. They will be grateful for your efforts and might even be willing to tutor you in their language.